I wonder if Richard has four toes! Yeah that was a shocker. The way I see it is, smoking appeared to Ben as his mother because Ben is special somehow. Why else seek him out specifically? There must be a reason. Unless he was just the one Dharma person they could use to betray the other Dharma people. Once Ben met Richard in the jungle and told him he'd seen his dead mom, Richard realizes like that Ben is the 'one'. (One what? I dunno) So he tells him to be patient and tells him to wait 10 years (or so) and then kill your dad, not sure if Ben knew they were going to wipe out all of them, probably. Ben then becomes their leader because he was chosen by Jacob? There must have been another of the hostiles that was in touch with Jacob though before Ben. And now it seems Jacob has chosen Locke. Which drives Ben up a wall. Even Ben's peeps look at Locke as a leader. Ben is the evil dark one and Locke is the good light one.